To All You Non-Assistance Dogs (by: Lucky)

This blog entry is in honor of all you non-assistance dogs out there (aka "pets", or in puppy raiser language "keepers"). In case our peeps forget just how much assistance WE provide, here is a reminder list that can be posted on the fridge (so they can read it as they are getting you something to eat):

1) We protect the home from mailmen, gardeners, workers of any kind, squirrels, cats, and children selling girl scout cookies.

2) For those of us who have to deal with assistance puppy after assistance dog, WE provide these pups with all of their fundamental training (i.e. we teach them that they are the lowest pup on the totem pole, they can only play with toys when we are no longer interested, and don't bug us unless we want to be bugged).

3) We remind our peeps that they need to get off their butts and get some exercise... and going to the gym, or doing anything else that doesn't include us, does NOT count.

4) We serve as an alarm clock on weekends (for some reason alarm clocks always seem to break on weekends and our peeps tend to oversleep).

5) We keep our peeps from being idle (i.e. recently, I gave my pal the opportunity to fix the blinds and drywall I chewed up).

6) We remind our peeps when it's time to eat... which is pretty much always.

7) We show our peeps where our leashes and food are located... just in case they forget.

8) We refrain from howling when our peeps subject us to tv shows like American Idol.

9) We remind our peeps that there are things in life MUCH more important than work... like playing with us!

10) For those of us who have peeps who are puppy raisers, we provide them with a shoulder to cry on when they've turned in a pup... and, we remind them there is no reason to be upset cause they've still got us!